They call it a 'state of limbo', but I wonder if it's still a limbo when it has lasted for 1 month. In an ideal world, this state of confusion, transition, adaptation should be over within a short period of time because as it is, life is way too short to waste time on uncertainties.
No matter how hard you try to be the puppet master of the self, this art of control becomes rather tedious when it comes to building perspectives.
I don't care what the majority tells me about decision-making processes, but i'm tired of analyzing. I'm tired of thinking and feeling, which means i am tired of BEING.
Is it even possible to feel neither?
I'd say yes.
The problem is not how to achieve it, but how to prolong it. You know those seconds that you encounter, when nothing else matters;not what you feel,or think, but merely that one particular moment. It's like this blankness you endure,and all that matters is there and then, now and here.
Forget the past and future and just BE present.
But how do you BE when you're in a continuous relationship with different time-lines?
This balancing act becomes off-balanced when you're constantly trying to create leverage between the wants and the supposed.
I guess its rather hard when you resort to routes that you were never really sure of in the first place. Why should we feel this constant struggle to FIT IN to something?to belong?
I know "Freedom" is subjective, but since its relative, it should be easier for us to craft it,right?
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Friday, May 7, 2010
Tech-Savvy
GOT YA!!
aha!
take that,you censorship devil!
I actually missed my blog!what a loser comment.
...........back to my emo-state-of-mind:
I am in a world so unknown that every now and then, I crack into a smile as though it was a form of humour. I am roaming around this strange land that is making me strangely connected to "home". I still don't know what it is, but it seems like I find ways to identify that sense of comfort, as though its a form of longing for something that is not even there.
I don't remember feeling this way 2 months ago when I was in South America. Biased perspective? For sure. At least I'm aware of it. And here I am participating in this monologue as though I need an audience. I guess what i really do need is a reminder to what I had found in all my ventures and more importantly, to not forget that energy I had found and changed these way of living that had kept me bounded.
aha!
take that,you censorship devil!
I actually missed my blog!what a loser comment.
...........back to my emo-state-of-mind:
I am in a world so unknown that every now and then, I crack into a smile as though it was a form of humour. I am roaming around this strange land that is making me strangely connected to "home". I still don't know what it is, but it seems like I find ways to identify that sense of comfort, as though its a form of longing for something that is not even there.
I don't remember feeling this way 2 months ago when I was in South America. Biased perspective? For sure. At least I'm aware of it. And here I am participating in this monologue as though I need an audience. I guess what i really do need is a reminder to what I had found in all my ventures and more importantly, to not forget that energy I had found and changed these way of living that had kept me bounded.
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